I want to address a common misconception I see in discussions of sexual preferences, in part because it’s helping lay a foundation for a discussion of sex work I’m going to explore in some upcoming posts. People seem to have this idea that if they’re not into it, no one else can be or should be. Like, “Ew, I think anal sex is gross, who could do that?” Or “I can’t believe some people like being tied up and spanked, that’s disgusting.” Or “I would never, ever sell sex, how could anyone else do so?” Continue Reading →
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Recent posts
BDSM As A Sexual Orientation
The idea of sexual orientation is a complicated one. There’s a certain comfort in believing that you’re “hard-wired” to be a certain way, especially for minority or stigmatized groups who can justifiably say, why would I choose this given how hard it is to be this way? I think this also connects to how in the Western world, identity is seen as something stable and intrinsic; yeah, people will change over time, but you are who you are at your very core and you were probably born that way. Sex activist Clarisse Thorn has promulgated the idea that BDSM (a configuration of activities including bondage and domination, sadism and masochism, domination and submission) is a sexual orientation. This may seem strange at first, especially if you’re used to hearing that being gay or straight is a sexual orientation. Continue Reading →
Being Sexually Submissive—Or Sexually Anything—Doesn’t Impact Your Competence
I love this piece by Clarisse Thorn investigating the links between some women’s sexual submission and the rest of their lives. To quote my favorite part:
“Sexual kinks don’t necessarily affect one’s performance in non-sexual fields. A sexually submissive woman won’t make a bad CEO (at least, not because she’s sexually submissive). I mean, come on, it’s not like there aren’t sexually submissive men in powerful corporate positions.” In short, your sexual preferences are just one part of your identity. Continue Reading →
Fashion And BDSM Are Not The Same
Not everyone who wears leather pants is into BDSM, and not everyone who is into BDSM wears leather pants. Unfortunately there are cases where the mainstream or popular media confuses BDSM and fashion. I encountered two specific articles recently that have troubled me quite a bit. One was from the August issue of Cosmopolitan magazine and the other was a movie review of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo from the New York Times. Korin Miller’s Cosmopolitan article Whips, Chains, Cages. Continue Reading →
Introducing New MSP Blogger: Kiersten
Hi everyone! I’m Kiersten and I’m very
excited to add my voice to the MSP blogging team. I’m an insatiably curious nerd who happens to be fascinated with sex. There really isn’t much about it that isn’t interesting. I’m about to start my fourth year at the University of Chicago and in a desperate attempt to satisfy my curiosity I’m majoring in Gender Studies and minoring in Statistics. Continue Reading →