desire

Recent posts

Where Do Desires Come From?

Why do we find certain things sexy, and other things un-sexy? How much of our desires are governed by genes, or culture, or individual quirks? From being turned on by “normal” things like a glimpse of an attractive body to the less mainstream attractions like fetish wear and pain, there are a variety of factors influencing what people find desirable. Be warned, this is a somewhat rambling post, representing my attempt to get a hold on what is perhaps one of the trickiest aspects of sexuality: where desires come from. Some desires are likely connected to our evolution and our genes, such as the desire for traits that are adaptive to survival. Continue Reading →

What can I do to get my libido back? Should I fake it?

Question:
I have three children under the age of 6 and by the time it gets to be night and the kids are in bed, the last thing I want to do is have sex with my husband. What can I do to feel more in the mood or get my libido back? Or do you think I should just fake it? Answer:
No matter how wonderful women’s relationships are, it’s a fact that women often bear more than their fair share of household chores and childcare responsibilities. Even when couples are able to share the load 50/50, it’s a lot to expect desire to thrive when one has spent the past 14 hours packing lunches, changing diapers, or dropping everything to comfort a crying child. Continue Reading →

Must#4 for Great Sex: Go to bed early.

Regular MSP readers have likely read by Must#1 for Great Sex as well as Must#2 and Must#3. Now on to Must#4: Go to bed early. Please, by all means, go to bed when you’re still ready to rock! At least if you want to have sex, that is. Too often, we get into routines in which we head to bed only when we are dripping with exhaustion. Continue Reading →

Overheard at 2Amys in Georgetown

To paraphrase a conversation I heard between two 30-ish women at the Georgetown 2Amys a week ago:

Woman 1: Like a lot of the girls I grew up with, I grew up wanting to marry a wealthy man to take care of me. But unlike a lot of my friends, I feel like I need to wake up with a purpose and do something. Woman 2: So you’re saying you want a part time job? Or to volunteer? W1: Yeah, maybe. Continue Reading →