better sex

Recent posts

Why Can’t We Just Talk About Sex?

I’m annoyed at our sex-phobic culture a lot of the time, for a lot of reasons, but today it’s specifically because we consider it taboo to talk about sex outside of a few limited contexts. When is it okay to talk about sex? Presumably with one’s partner(s) – though in the mainstream culture it’s assumed that in order to talk about sex you’re heterosexually married and pursuing sexual activities as a way to procreate. And in theory you should be able to discuss sex with your medical professionals, especially if you’re experiencing a disorder that’s sexual in nature (genital pain, trying to conceive, etc.). Otherwise, there aren’t many socially acceptable venues in which to openly and honestly discuss sex. Continue Reading →

The Beauty Of Sexual Favors

Ever since graduation (which yes, FINALLY – as of May 7th – I am no longer an undergrad!) I’ve had a lot of time to catch up on one of my favorite guilty pleasures - stocking up and sifting through magazines. So as I am reading through the May 2011 edition of GQ I stumble upon an article that is encouraging couples whose sex lives may be lacking in lust to consider trading sexual favors for random tasks that need to be eliminated off the ‘to-do list’ (think…offering him oral sex if he’ll do the dishes – hence the selected image below). Although this idea of keeping the relationship interesting through sex play such as this is not new by any means – I think openness and creativity are important elements to work into the mix. Not all couples are going to have mind-blowing sex all of the time, and eventually things can become routine – so it’s important to be willing to work with your partner if they’re wanting to try new things. Not only can this concept of using sexual favors be physically satisfying, it can allow you (and your partner) to explore  desires and aspects of your sexuality that normally you may be too bashful to suggest. Continue Reading →

Want Something? Ask First

When you are interested in trying something new with your partner it is sometimes difficult to broach the topic, especially if you aren’t sure about how your partner will react. Being anxious about bringing up your desires with your partner is normal, of course you would like to get a positive reaction from them, but there is no way of knowing for sure what they will say. However, unless your partner is psychic, there is no way for them to know that you are interested in trying something new unless you say something. Continue Reading →

Does Forgetting Make for Better Sex?

Last week I wrote about how sex might be different if people could forgive. This week, I’d like to imagine how sex could be different if only we could forget. However, I don’t mean “forget” in the traditional “forgive and forget” kind of way. Rather, I wonder how sex would change if we could approach it with a clean slate more of the time and with less anxiety about the past or present. I have to assume that we would be open to a far wider range of possibilities if only if we didn’t approach sex feeling as though we “know” with certainty how we liked to be touched or how a particular type of touch is what brings us to orgasm. Continue Reading →

The Art of Sex and Being an Attentive Lover

Sex is an intimate dance between the physical and emotional realms of experience. Many sex tips and techniques focus on the physicality of sex such as how to last longer during sex, how to orgasm during sex, or how to get or maintain an erection during sex. Although orgasms, erections and learning to last longer are influenced by both mind and body, we often focus on the body to the exclusion of the mind and the emotions. In fact, being a good lover is about more than coming at the right time or having a hard enough erect penis. Continue Reading →

How to flirt: tips for even the most seasoned partners

Flirting is used in many different ways. At its most basic level, people may flirt with others in order to be able to get something they want: a discount, a better place in line, or free drinks. In the context of romance and sex, people flirt to signal their interest. A prolonged look across a crowded room can mean “I’m interested, come talk to me!” or it can pose a question, as in ”wanna have sex?” Continue Reading →

Public Sex: Four Tips For Better Sex

In the previous three weeks, I wrote about three types of sex that I think are worth a try: Passionate Crazy Sex, Lazy Day in Bed Sex, and Making Sweet Romance. So what’s the fourth type of sex that gets my vote? Public Peek-a-Boo Sex, of course.  

Not that I’m advocating having sex where you could potentially get caught (and I am certainly not advocating any type of public sex that would be noticed by others or that would disturb or offend others), but I am advocating that at least once in your life, you consider some type of public sex. Why? Continue Reading →

When Sex is Boring: Questions to Ask Yourself

Assuming, that is, that you actually like this person and are attracted to him or her. I made this one day after work when I apparently had too much time on my hands. And if you click on the image once or twice, you should be able to enlarge it. Feel free to print it out and tape it to the wall above your bed so that you can see it while you are in missionary or woman on top and wondering how to make things a little more fun and unexpected. And if all else fails, check out my guide or Gizmodo’s guide to iPhone sex. Continue Reading →

How to Make Love: Five Tips for Better Sex

In the past two weeks, I’ve written about two types of sex that MSP readers might want to try: Passionate Crazy Sex and Lazy Day in Bed Sex (tips for each were included in their respective posts). So what gets my vote this week? None other than Making Sweet Romance. Although few young women and men mouth the term “make love” (at least publicly) without at least a little discomfort, the fact is that most women and men want to feel as though the physical act of sex is connected to an emotional experience of love. Okay, so this isn’t true every single time you have sex nor is it true with every partner, but certainly it’s something many of us crave here and there, right? Continue Reading →

Foreplay Tips for Better Sex

There’s a reason that the word “play” is paramount to “foreplay”. Time and again, what we find is that couples enjoy playfulness and that it can even spark sexual desire. This is especially true for women and for couples who have been together for a long time. Sex is often driven by closeness, intimacy and those unexpected moments that remind you why you’re as into your partner as you are – even if, at times, you’re most excited somewhere way down deep. After all, the everyday annoyances of life can grate on any relationship, which is why it is so important to make time for play. Continue Reading →