Bad Sex Karma

Recent posts

Thanks, Tennessee Legislature!

Dear Tennessee Governor Haslem and the Tennessee legislature,

I just wanted to take this opportunity to thank you.  Due to your hard work at drafting and passing the HB 3621 and SB 3310 law, my sex therapy practice will continue to be profitable for years.  While your law outlawing the teaching of  ”gateway sexual activity” and “non-coital sexual activity” is on the books, thousands of Tennessee teens will be taught that their sexual feelings are bad and that they need to refrain from any kind of affectionate touching until their relationship is recognized by the state, and the only way to be sexual with someone is through coitus in marriage.  And my fellow sex educators in your state have their hands tied in terms of giving these confused teens options and speaking frankly about things they could do to deal with these sexual feelings in a way that lower their risks of making their partner or themselves pregnant or contracting STIs. So, thank you, because as a sex therapist, I will reap the benefits of this law for many years.  People will come to me confused as to why the sex in their marriage has fallen apart, or asking how they can stop being attracted to their same gender because they were never taught that same gender attraction was possible, or that any kind of sex exists besides coitus in the context of marriage. Perhaps I’ll even get a chance to meet with a young man who is diagnosed with HIV because his school didn’t address the type of sex he was having, and the risks involved with that. In short, your legislation will allow many more people to be undereducated about sex and relationships, which will lead to problems down the road, even in their state-approved marriages.  They will come to my sex therapy practice to talk about their deep dissatisfaction with their sex lives which may have been prevented were it not for your legislation. Thanks also for helping people think that sex should be painful and scary, and not the pleasurable, wonderful thing that it can and should be.  Those people will need counseling in the future when they don’t want to have sex because they simply don’t like it, or because their head is so filled with sex-negative messages that even when they want to enjoy sex, they can’t get to the point where it feels good. Continue Reading →

Liking Sex Doesn’t Make You a Slut

That’s right ladies, you read me correctly: You can still be crazy about sex and have a good reputation. I know this may seem like a huge shocker—but after reading Chris Jones’ latest piece in Esquire (titled, Ladies: You’re Not as Good as You Think), I feel so much more enlightened on how to be good in bed—I feel as if I could teach a college course on it. So to share my newfound knowledge on what makes women the ultimate hook-up , let me give you the breakdown on the top five lessons I learned from CJ. Continue Reading →

Here’s One Way To Get Back At Your Partner’s Former Flame…

According to this article in the Herald Tribune, Natasha Larson, a 35 year old day care operator from Sarasota, was arrested for soliciting sex on Craigslist. Here’s the kicker- she used the same and address of her husband’s ex. According to the police report, the ad led to several phone calls and visits from numerous men, making the victim (and her children) feel unsafe at home. The ad looked something like this: “I am currently dating a descent man but he is lacking some skills in the bedroom. Its nice but I need to be thrown around a little bit and to be dominated, that is exciting for me. Continue Reading →

Utah Mom Tries To Sell Daughter’s Virginity For $10,000

On May 24th, ABC News reported that a Utah mother attempted to sell her teenage daughter’s virginity- for $10,000. A 32 year old mom from Salt Lake City reportedly offered to sell her 13-year-old daughter’s virginity to a man she met online. She also took the man and her daughter to a local Victoria’s Secret store, where she had her daughter model various lingerie sets for the man. The mother also sold partially nude photographs of her daughter to another man she had met online. At press time, the mother was being held at a Salt Lake City jail and is facing two counts of aggravated sexual abuse of a child. Continue Reading →

Is this Shirt Selling More or Less than a Month Ago?

Do you think this shirt from Urban Outfitters is selling more or less compared to a month ago? I would guess less, but what do I know. Does the shirt make people nostalgic for the earlier days when Arnold Schwarzenegger was just a body builder or an actor? And not yet a man who hid his love child with his housekeeper from his wife and the children from his marriage? Continue Reading →

An Almost Deadly Love-Bite

A New Zealand woman was recently hospitalized after suffering a post-sex stroke. According to the article written about the incident, she was sitting in a chair watching television post-coitus when she experiences a loss of sensation in her left arm. She was rushed to the hospital, but the only injury was a hickey on the right side of her neck. Doctors believe that there was a fair amount of “suction” involved (no, really?) which led to a clot in an artery underneath the hickey, which had moved into the heart, giving the woman a stroke. Though the clot was fully treated within a week, the woman remains paralyzed in her left arm. Continue Reading →

How To Put On A Mediocre Sexuality Event: Sexpo Melbourne 2010

As I walked into the Melbourne Exhibition Centre, my hopes for the 2010 annual Sexpo were high. I saw lots of vanilla-looking over-50s and leather-clad 30-40-somethings, along with the scantily clad 20-somethings I was expecting. This apparent diversity was exciting! Perhaps Sexpo would be even more than I had hoped? Continue Reading →

European Women Get Vibrators, American Women Get Pads & Breath Mints

Though it seems like another lifetime ago, it was only last month that I went to Edinburgh, Scotland to attend a conference about vulvar and vaginal health. On my way back home – well, actually by way of New York – I stopped to use the airport ladies room before boarding my morning flight. I was almost out the door of the ladies’ when I noticed that the vending machines sold two types of small Durex vibrators. That’s right: women in the Edinburgh ladies room can buy period products (like tampons) or they can buy a vibrator. Amazing options, eh? Continue Reading →