The recent Weiner-sending-weiner-photos Twitter “scandal” has inspired a number of articles about how some men send photos of their penis to others, and not always to real life partners but perhaps hoped-for partners, or at least people with whom they flirt. A similar slew of penis photo articles were published following news that Brett Favre and Kanye West had taken and shared photos of their genitals.
Among these articles is sometimes a sense that women don’t want to receive men’s penis photos in the first place. In many cases, this is true – too often, men send unwelcome photos of their genitals to people who don’t really want them or may even find the photos “gross”. As a sex columnist, I’ve personally received more than my share of penis photos from male readers who, I believe, pretend to have a sex question as an excuse to send me their naked chest and/or penis photos (to be fair, most people who write to me with their sex questions are sincere with their questions; however, the ones that include naked chest and/or penis photos are written in an entirely different manner).
But there are also instances in which people – including many women – welcome penis and/or naked chest photos sent from men. True, sometimes people “welcome” these photos just because it’s funny to them. And sometimes it’s a power trip for people to feel that they can ask for someone to do something as revealing or vulnerable as taking a naked photo and sending it to them. There are even plenty of situations in which people ask for naked/penis photos so that they can use them for future blackmail (scary but true).
Then there are instances in which women and men who are into men actually like receiving photos of men’s genitals. It might even turn the person who’s receiving the photos on. Maybe they even masturbate to the photos or sneak a peek when they’re feeling randy. I know that goes against the grain of how some people would like to portray women, but what’s so great about portraying women as sexless beings who aren’t into nudity or sex under any circumstances? The bigger issue to me in the sharing of naked and/or genital photos isn’t whether someone does it at all but whether it’s a consensual act and, at a personal level for those involved (and not for me or others to judge), whether it’s okay within the boundaries of that person’s relationship, if they’re in one at the time. Some people have open relationships and a little online photo sharing isn’t that big of a deal. Others would equate online naked photo sharing with cheating.
All of this is to say…. I appreciated the moments in Katy Perry’s Last Friday Night video (above) in which her character sneaks peeks and feels of a guy’s genitals – or at least I appreciate the sense that a woman can be interested, curious about and “into” men’s genitals. The fact that the guy is totally passed out and so his consent is out the window is disappointing, of course – and, let’s face it, if gender roles were switched and there was a half naked woman on the bed who was passed out and being fondled by a man, few people would find humor in it. But the cheeky, comical, campy way the entire video is produced (plus cameos by Debbie Gibson, Hanson, Corey Feldman and Kenny G) gives different vibes – and in this context, a young woman’s interest in a young man’s penis is kind of cute – too bad it couldn’t have been portrayed as awake, consensual peeking and plating. Her interest, however, is a reminder that many women love men’s genitals – but perhaps not every man’s genitals, and perhaps not all the time, so ask before you hit send.
