Gay matchmaking not just boom-chicka-wow-wow

Gays and lesbians like relationships too – not just sex! If this surprises you, then go hang out at eharmony, the site that last year made headlines as their dating services were primarily for straight-identified men and women (apparently, they were even sued!). As if gays and lesbians aren’t looking for love and romance too! Enter sites like Chemistry.com, MyPartner.com and PartnerforLife.com who were more than ready and willing to fill the gap, provide services and make connections. It would be great if some of these sites would work more with scientists to see what works, what doesn’t, because we need to learn a lot more about gay and lesbian relationships so that we can better provide information and education to people who want it. We scientists are people too, and like to help (and yes, to learn).

Read the full article by San Francisco Chronicle writer Anastasia Ustinova on their web site.

[Above image via this site.]

About Dr. Debby Herbenick

Dr. Debby Herbenick

Dr. Debby Herbenick is a sex researcher at Indiana University, sexual health educator at The Kinsey Institute, columnist, and author of five books about sex and love. Learn more about her work at www.sexualhealth.indiana.edu.

  • JonBoy

    Yeah, Chemistry.com…kinda crappy. I filled out their survey and basically all they sent me were people who lived close to me and fit my age range that I was looking for. I canceled my account with them last week.

    I was actually thinking about this very topic this morning and was going to suggest it as a blog article :P

    A lot of people assume that gay/lesbian relationships are similar to straight relationships and, while they might be in some ways, there are big differences. There are lots of different aspects of gay relationships that aren’t in straight relationships at all.

    I really wish they’d get it figured out. In some locations where the “scene” isn’t conducive to dating, sometimes online options are some of your better choices.

  • JonBoy

    Yeah, Chemistry.com…kinda crappy. I filled out their survey and basically all they sent me were people who lived close to me and fit my age range that I was looking for. I canceled my account with them last week.

    I was actually thinking about this very topic this morning and was going to suggest it as a blog article :P

    A lot of people assume that gay/lesbian relationships are similar to straight relationships and, while they might be in some ways, there are big differences. There are lots of different aspects of gay relationships that aren’t in straight relationships at all.

    I really wish they’d get it figured out. In some locations where the “scene” isn’t conducive to dating, sometimes online options are some of your better choices.

  • Dr. Debby

    Serendipitous, for sure (and yes, do feel free to suggest other blog posts in the future).

    The truth is that so much of scientific literature in the past 30 years has focused on the “risks” of being gay – things like HIV/AIDS or substance abuse/depression among GLB-identified youth. It’s a sad fact that makes some of my friends and colleagues wonder what people will think when they look back one day and realize that wow, major parts of GLB-identified people’s lives have been completely ignored. Like basic health issues or factors that go into choosing, maintaining (and yes, even dissolving) relationships.

    We have a lot to learn and you are right that while there are some similarities between same-gender and other-gender relationships, there are some key differences too that may impact relationships.

    Thanks for your comment.

  • Dr. Debby

    Serendipitous, for sure (and yes, do feel free to suggest other blog posts in the future).

    The truth is that so much of scientific literature in the past 30 years has focused on the “risks” of being gay – things like HIV/AIDS or substance abuse/depression among GLB-identified youth. It’s a sad fact that makes some of my friends and colleagues wonder what people will think when they look back one day and realize that wow, major parts of GLB-identified people’s lives have been completely ignored. Like basic health issues or factors that go into choosing, maintaining (and yes, even dissolving) relationships.

    We have a lot to learn and you are right that while there are some similarities between same-gender and other-gender relationships, there are some key differences too that may impact relationships.

    Thanks for your comment.