Questions & Answers

Recent posts

Why Buy a Luxury Sex Toy?

Looking at the variety of high-end sex toys from distributors like Good Vibrations, Babeland, and MySecretLuxury, the price tags can be hard to swallow. You might think, “why spend over $100 on something that I can get for $15?” Well, for starters, you can’t get it for $15. But let me take some time to convince you why luxury sex toys are worth a pretty penny. Safety:

Think all sex toys are safe? Continue Reading →

Zombies and Your Love/Sex Life

When Kate alerted me to the coincidental zombie posts she and Jeana had written for today – and how they’d named it “Impromptu Zombie Theme Day” – I had to join the fun. Though I’m not personally into zombies, I can appreciate the idea of zombies and have enough of an interest to have apparently stored several memories of zombie-related things to share with you. For example:

1. I remembered seeing these Zombie Engagement photos taken by Amanda Rynda. I love that this couple decided to celebrate their engagement in their own way and with humor and style rather than a typical engagement photo session. Continue Reading →

Sex Made Easy is Officially Out Today!


My newest book, Sex Made Easy: Your Awkward Questions Answered – for Better, Smarter, Amazing Sex is officially out today and I couldn’t be happier. The small group of people I gave advance copies to have loved it which gives me hope that it will be as helpful to women and men as I’ve wanted it to be. Sex Made Easy was born out of the experience I’ve had for the past 13 years as a sex researcher/educator, with hundreds of people saying to me “You must have the most amazing sex life!” (given my work) and me thinking…. well, sometimes – but it’s definitely not a given. Continue Reading →

Q&A: How Can I Find a Sex Therapist in the Washington DC Area?

How can I find a sex therapist in the DC area who would be willing to help a gay couple work out their sexual issues together? Start by checking out the SSTAR directory:

And the AASECT directory ( (search by DC area or check out Virginia, Maryland if those make sense)

Honestly, the best thing to do is usually to peruse their sites, see to what extent they seem to fit with one’s own style, maybe even call or have an initial consult, etc. I think therapist-client fit is one of
the most important things. The sex therapists I know tend to be skilled at helping couples of all orientations but you can get a better sense for whether you think they’re the right fit for you as a couple if you go and meet them. Continue Reading →

Q&A: Can birth control affect vaginal lubrication or wetness?

Can birth control affect vaginal lubrication (amount/decrease)? Answer:

Most likely, yes, but there aren’t any very good studies on it. The latest generations of oral contraceptives (birth control pills) have very low estrogen and as estrogen is linked to vaginal lubrication, it makes sense that they’d be
linked. And certainly a number of young women/college students talk about having less wetness after going on the pill. I hear this often from my students. Also, medical doctors I know in the field of sexual medicine and gynecology believe they’re linked…. Continue Reading →

Q&A: Do Latex Condoms Cause UTIs (Urinary Tract Infections)?

I posted a shortened version of this Q&A on Twitter recently…. but here is the longer version. Question:

Have a friend who has a tendency to get UTIs which she notices after having sex (w/latex condom). From her research the latex is what seems to be the issue. Is/are
there any ways around this if she wants to remain sexually active (and safe/using protection, etc…). Continue Reading →

Thank You to My New Friends in Serbia!

Recently, a teacher at a school in Serbia contacted me about answering sexuality-related questions from his students via Skype. His students (all middle schoolers) are incredibly bright and articulate and asked very good questions about sexual health, pregnancy, sexually transmissible infections, condom use, cultural issues related to sexuality, and more.This morning I woke up to find a number of “thank you” emails from them, some with follow-up questions (also, all very good questions). I greatly enjoyed being a part of their class for the day and wanted to give a big thanks to them, and to their teacher, for asking me to join in their conversation! Continue Reading →

Watch Me & Dan Savage Talk About Porn Addiction, Masturbation & Losing Virginity on IU’s Campus Talk TV Show

Earlier this Fall, Dan Savage (sex columnist, author and founder of the It Gets Better Project) and I were guests on an Indiana University campus TV show called Campus Talk. It turns out that the producers actually bleep bad words out of the program. There are a few funny stories linked with how this all went down, but I’ll save those for another evening that involves wine. Watch the video above, in which we discuss masturbation, the whole porn addiction/sex addiction model, masturbation, sex research, condom use and virginity loss. Follow us on Twitter and make friends with us on Facebook. Continue Reading →