Ever since graduation (which yes, FINALLY – as of May 7th – I am no longer an undergrad!) I’ve had a lot of time to catch up on one of my favorite guilty pleasures - stocking up and sifting through magazines. So as I am reading through the May 2011 edition of GQ I stumble upon an article that is encouraging couples whose sex lives may be lacking in lust to consider trading sexual favors for random tasks that need to be eliminated off the ‘to-do list’ (think…offering him oral sex if he’ll do the dishes – hence the selected image below). Although this idea of keeping the relationship interesting through sex play such as this is not new by any means – I think openness and creativity are important elements to work into the mix. Not all couples are going to have mind-blowing sex all of the time, and eventually things can become routine – so it’s important to be willing to work with your partner if they’re wanting to try new things. Not only can this concept of using sexual favors be physically satisfying, it can allow you (and your partner) to explore desires and aspects of your sexuality that normally you may be too bashful to suggest. Continue Reading →
Madeline Haller
Madeline Haller is an Assistant Editor for MensHealth.com. Haller received her bachelor's degree in journalism from Indiana University, with a second concentration in gender studies. When she's not writing for MSP/MH, you can find her running, enjoying a cup of coffee, or searching for the perfect shade of red lipstick.
Recent posts
Ladies, What’s So Scary About Masturbation?
I noticed a specific link being passed around on Twitter this afternoon, and after reading a tweet referring to a parallel between ‘using Twitter and how frequent one masturbates’ - my curiosity got the best of me.
The link redirects to an article on Okcupid.com which has 10 really interesting charts pertaining to sex, masturbation, body image, etc — where all the data collected for the graphics were obtained from OkCupid users. While I was skimming through these charts (and yes, there really was one about masturbating and Twitter usage!), the one I found most interesting was a graph which displayed graphics about female/male masturbation habits. The image shows the ratio (male-female) of individuals who claim that they have never masturbated – and then the information was further broken down into seven religious categories (see image). Out of the seven categories, the graph shows that both men and women who are Jewish scored the highest when it comes to anti-hands on fun; yet I suppose what bothers me the most about this graph is – in every category women always rank higher than men (in terms of claiming that they have never masturbated).
[Check out the link above in order to see the other religions included in the study.]
So here is where I am curious to get some MSP-viewer feedback, ladies – what’s the deal? Do you think women are being genuinely honest when they claim they have never masturbated? Continue Reading →
Must-See Film: “Middle Sexes: Redefining He And She”
A few weeks ago in my queer theory seminar, we screened a film called “Middle Sexes: Redefining He and She” (directed by Antony Thomas) and I thought it was a real ‘eye-opener’ to how different our culture deals with aspects of sexuality compared to others across the globe. This 54 minutes documentary compares gender variance in a handful of different countries as well as examines the diversity of human sexuality within different cultures and communities. I found the film exceptionally interesting because the viewer not only receives commentary from scientific experts – they receive many first hand accounts from individuals who do not categorize themselves within the western male/female binary. The overall message I took from the film was to be more open to the experiences of others and never to make assumptions about one’s presented gender (as well as sexual) identity. It made me feel a bit ashamed to think our society (or a large portion of it) shuns those who do not fit into (or conform to) the typical male/female binaries; and honestly just from watching this film, I’ve developed a new outlook on how I view our gender system. Continue Reading →
S/M Making A Come Back
I’m sure many of you may have already heard Rihanna’s latest song “S&M” – but in case you haven’t (or in case you haven’t been able to check out the video) I thought I’d share the link to her latest piece. I heard the song a while back and now that the music video has come out, I can say - it is definitely not what I would have expected (but in a good way). I’ve always been a fan of Rihanna’s music as well as a fan of sadomasochism (or really any form of sexual expression); yet I think it’s so interesting how a pop star can make something trendy (especially when you consider how taboo S&M is to many people). The other night my roommates and I were sitting in our living room and one of them brought up the topic of Rihanna’s video – she just couldn’t believe how “out there” the video was. We then came to find out that this said roommate didn’t know what S&M stood for (so obviously it’s understandable why the video wouldn’t make much sense to her). Continue Reading →
What Causes Women’s Post-Sex Blues?
I recently read an interesting article from NYDailyNews.com discussing a recent study that was conducted in Australia pertaining to feelings of sadness post-sex. The study indicated that out of the 200 women they surveyed – at least one-third of the women felt sadness, anxiety, or irritability after sex. Yet what I found most interesting in the article was the reasons (or causes) for these feelings of sadness; the article listed the following (possible) explanations:
previous sexual abuse which may lead to feelings of guilt or shame,
emotional characteristics which may lead to feelings of sadness. The author of the study (Robert Schweitzer) also stated additional research needs to be done to see if the way women perceive themselves in the bedroom could has any effect on their post-sex feelings. But the one thing that comes to my mind when I think of irritability post-sex is lack of satisfaction in bed. Continue Reading →
Sex Discrimination In The Newsroom
I’ve been recently working on a piece for a war and terrorism class pertaining to women reporters and overseas affairs, and I thought MSP would be a good outlet to share some of the info and get your reaction. As the news has well informed us, back on February 11th, CBS news correspondent Lara Logan was attacked at Tahrir Square in Egypt by an outraged mob of Egyptians. We later learned that Logan was sexually assaulted and beaten in the midst of the attack, being rescued soon after by a group of women as well as (an estimated) 20 Egyptian soldiers. Once word broke of the attack, stories were popping up left and right about her assault, yet not all were informative. Many blogs* were posting stories* spewing the typical (negative) rape responses, such as “she was asking for it,” or “she should have known better and not put herself in that position.” Continue Reading →
Blog Humor
Within the past week or so, my Twitter feed has been overloaded with tweets pertaining to the crisis in Japan (which is clearly upsetting), tweets from friends who are partying because they are on spring break (which are clearly nonsensical/not legible), or tweets concerning Charlie Sheen – obviously then followed by his famous #winning/#losing trend he has initiated (which is clearly annoying). But today in the midst of all the chaos on my twitter feed, a friend tweeted an image preceeded by the text “blogger sex…” So in case you’re having similar issues, or just need a good laugh, I thought I would share the image. And how appropriate, as I am indeed sharing this on a blog! Learn about MSP posts as they happen by following us on Twitter@mysexprofessor or make friends with us on Facebook. Continue Reading →
Men: Say Hello To Feminism
Back in January, Men’s Health magazine added a new feature on their website – a feminist blog! That’s right ladies and gentleman, Men’s Health – one of the nation’s leading magazines providing sex, health, and fitness advice for men – has a feminist blog. The website states, “This blog isn’t about Gloria Steinem, bra-burning, or man hating. But it is about feminism, the kind that makes a modern woman worth listening to, debating, and dating.” Personally, I think it’s a great idea because as we know – the word feminism doesn’t always carry the most positive connotation. Continue Reading →
Sex Toy Review: MyPleasure Waterproof Pocket Rocket
Here we are in the middle of March and I still find myself wondering about how people spend romantic occasions, such as Valentine’s Day. Do you spend them with your partner or prefer flying solo? Do you go out to a fancy dinner or keep it low key and cook at home? Do you surprise a loved one with jewelry or maybe you’re more traditional and stick to the flower/chocolate combo? Well this year – whatever the occasion – I challenge you to spice things up – why not try a sex toy? Continue Reading →
Searching For Sex Along The East Coast?
I recently stumbled upon an article on nymag.com and after I read the title, I was instantly sold: “New York Sex Heat Map: ‘The Deeper Into Brooklyn You Go, the Kinkier People Get’”. And let’s be honest, who could turn down a title that has ‘sex’ and ‘kinkier’ in the same line? Moving on past the ultra-catchy title, after reading the article, I thought I’d pass it along as a fun read for all the MSP viewers (especially those who may be taking a trip to New York in the near future… just kidding… or am I?)
Just a quick recap: the article discusses a map of New York which was generated by OkCupid, an online dating website that has over seven million monthly users (most which can be found in NY). Continue Reading →